The power of the smelly sheets

The boy, like many kids (actually, like many adults), has a stubborn streak.  When he gets something stuck in his head, it's near-impossible to change his mind.  The frustrating thing about it is that what he decides to allow to stick in his head is often unreasonable, rarely predictable, and usually seems to have nothing to do with anything that has happened before, is happening at the moment, or will happen in the future.

The latest evidence of this stubborn side is actually, for once, kind of paying off for me.

At 4.5 years old, he hasn't logged a lot of hours sleeping in his own bed.  He spent the first 3 years co-sleeping with me, then at some point in his third year we pawned him off on his sister, and he spent over a year sleeping with her in her queen bed (coming to my bed an hour or two before we all woke up for the morning).

Recently, we moved him to his own room, to his tiny toddler car bed that he loves to play on and jump on, but hasn't actually slept in very much.  The transition went much better than we were expecting, and every night he went to sleep happily in his bed, surrounded by pillows and stuffed animals.  As before, he'd make his way to my bed at about 6am.  This lasted a few nights, and slowly but surely, the time that he moved beds got earlier and earlier, until we were at a point where I'd go up for bed and he'd already be there, having shuffled down the hall on his own while I was still downstairs watching something like CSI: Saskatoon, or NCIS: Rochester.

I love co-sleeping, but with our queen sized bed, my semi-bad back, and G's determination to maintain his full half of the bed no matter whom I let into MY half of the bed, I wasn't sleeping well.

I was trying to figure out an effective but easy way to convince him to stay longer in his bed, but nothing was working.

Cue stubbornness.

His nighttime pullup (yes, still in pullups at night, a rant for another post) had leaked a tiny bit and made a small damp spot on the sheets on his car bed.  G was changing the sheets at bedtime that night, the boy happened to be in one of those stubborn moods, and he became adamant that he needed THOSE sheets on his bed, and no, he DIDN'T care if they were smelly.  He had no prior favourite sheets, had never given any indication he ever noticed the sheets, but suddenly, he HAD to have bumblebees on his sheets, and NO, those animals on the clean sheets were entirely unacceptable. Screw you, cute giraffes.

I sensed G was frustrated, so in trying to lighten the mood I joked to the boy that if he slept the whole night in his bed that night, he could have the smelly sheets back.  But he took me seriously, and after some negotiation, it was decided that the smelly sheets would stay on for as long as he wanted, for as long as he slept each night in his bed.  The first time he didn't sleep the whole night in his own bed, I would get to change the sheets.

(I feel the need to explain that the sheets aren't really smelly. They need changing, sure, but I'm not letting my son sleep on stinky, urine-soaked sheets.  We just call them the "smelly sheets" because that was one of the first things out of my mouth when I was first trying to convince him to let G change the sheets. By the way, not smart - don't ask a kid feeling cranky and stubborn a question like "you don't want to sleep on smelly sheets, do you?" because the answer will not be what you want it to be.)

To make a long story short (too late), he has now slept in his bed all night every night for three entire weeks, which most certainly surpasses the sum total of the random nights he's spent in his own bed in the 4.5 years leading up to this.

Last night he even came in at about 4am, and said "okay, I'm ready for clean sheets now."  After my mental fist pump, I whispered that I'd change them tomorrow.  He paused, then asked me what animals are on the new sheets.  I said I didn't know, that I'd just put on whatever was clean.  Another pause, then his head lifted, and he said "actually, I don't want you to change my sheets, I'm going to go back and sleep in my bed." And off he went!

My mom got a kick out of pointing out that, after that many years of wanting to sleep with me, not to mention in the midst of a very clingy phase that has been going on for a month now (help me!), the boy has decided that he's willing to forego special cuddling with Mommy for... stinky sheets.  So touching.

Beach Day

Despite living in a city with a selection of beaches to visit, we rarely actually go. Even for this particular beach day of which I speak, we drove to another place to go to their beach. Why, I'm not sure... same reason I've been to more museums in other cities than I've been to in my own.

Anyway, it was a day trip initiated by some friends (with kids almost the exact same ages as ours), and to be honest I wasn't all that excited about it. I knew the kids would have a good time, and that was the whole point of the thing, but I wasn't expecting that I'd enjoy it myself. I mean... inescapable sun, heat, crowds, swimming in water where various plants and animals reside? Not my idea of the best way to spend the day. 

Turns out it was a great day, for me as well as the kids.

The weather wasn't too hot (perhaps even a bit cool at times, but I'm not complaining), the crowds were entirely manageable, and mostly down at the other end of the beach. I did manage to get a nasty sunburn on my shoulders, chest, and the tip of my nose, but that didn't cause any suffering until the next day (and the day after that, and the day after that).

The kids are at a nice stage where they need us enough that we don't feel extraneous, not to mention we can still get down in the sand and build sandcastles with them, but we also had the occasional break to just sit back and have a bit of conversation where we could actually complete a sentence or two.

Speaking of conversation, it was nice because these are relatively new friends, and for someone (me) who doesn't make new friends very easily (because that requires, you know, actual talking to people, sometimes even actual eye contact at the same time), a day trip was a bit intimidating.  But they're lovely people, and we all seem to connect.

(The boy and their daughter definitely do not connect, but that is for another entry where I stress and worry about matters such as how to be a better parent, how to have successful friendships with people who don't parent exactly the same way I do, and the confounding differences between boys and girls.)

The day was leisurely, but full; we swam, ate, chatted, flew kites ($1 each at dollar store, provided so much fun for the kids... and dads too), played soccer, volleyball, frisbee, and of course there were the requisite sand castles and burying of Daddy.

All in all, a completely fabulous day, and I would say one of my favourite days of the summer holidays so far.

The kids agree!

Rashy

Both kids have come down with something this summer, that resulted in no symptoms except for a severe-looking rash, mainly on their cheeks.

The girl's showed up first and developed slowly.  I took her to the doctor on day 3 and probably would've waited even longer, except she was headed up to the cottage for the weekend and I wanted to rest easy.  Our doctor, who is almost one year into a two-year break to accompany her husband abroad for work, was back for a holiday and was working (I'd love a job that I loved so much that I'd choose to work on my vacation, instead of relaxing, visiting family and friends, etc.) so it was a great surprise when she walked into the room. 

I also thought it was good, because she knows our medical history and could have that in mind while making a diagnosis, but I think she was in a vacation frame of mind and had socialising and catching up as a priority, instead of more serious doctoring. As it was, the girl has had various minor but annoying (and mostly unexplained) skin issues for her whole life, so the doctor, using that aforementioned knowledge of our medical history, and no actual examination of my daughter that I noticed, chalked it up to "she's just got really sensitive skin, and is having a reaction to something," and sent us on our way, assuring us that we were fine to see other kids.  She suggested some benadryl if I felt like it.  In the way that some people, particularly me, do when confronted with questionable opinions from authority figures, I adopted an "I'm totally listening, and agree with everything" expression, nodded seriously, and left it at that.

When the rash had dissipated only slightly in three more days and one cheek had adopted a somewhat alarming circular-shaped rash (okay, yes, I'm neurotic, but I have a "thing" about rashes - I have a hard time convincing myself that they are not (a) an allergic reaction that's about to lead to throat swelling and death, (b) necrotizing fasciitis, or (c) some kind of exotic microscopic insect, laying eggs under the skin), I called back, and was told by the nurse to try more benalyn and re-assess in the morning.  Does benalyn cure flesh-eating disease?!

A week after the girl's rash made it's first appearance and was largely gone, the boy's cheeks turned red, and I had them back to the doctor, since it was obviously no longer simply her sensitive skin reacting to something.  We saw another doctor this time, and this time it was deemed viral, the clues being the boy's slightly red throat, and that he got it a week after his sister. Neither had any other symptoms of any sort of virus.

We were assured, again, that we needn't worry about being contagious, and sent on our way.

I gather this was the more accurate diagnosis, given that the boy's rash followed the same course as the girl's, although I'm still not 100% convinced.  Either way, we are now, knock wood, rash free.

Confident in his masculinity

The boy is man enough to wear a pink shirt, lime green toenail polish, and a pink floral backpack with equal aplomb as yesterday's attire, which included a spiderman t-shirt, a superhero cape, and a transformers rocket in hand that was shooting everything in sight.

Karate fish

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Little Gardener

Testing 1, 2, 3.